Search Results

When it comes to matters of the heart, knowing what you truly need can transform your dating journey. Often, we hear about compromise and flexibility in relationships—and while these qualities are invaluable, having clear non-negotiables can serve as the foundation for a healthy, lasting partnership. In this blog post, we’ll explore what non-negotiables are, why they matter, and how to define them for your next relationship. What Are Non-Negotiables? Non-negotiables are the essential qualities, values, and boundaries you require in a relationship. They are the aspects you simply can’t compromise on because they reflect your deepest sense of self and what you need to thrive. Unlike preferences or desires that might be flexible, non-negotiables are the deal-breakers. They could include: Core Values:  Honesty, integrity, kindness, or shared spiritual beliefs. Communication Style:  The need for open dialogue, conflict resolution, or emotional vulnerability. Lifestyle Choices:  Views on family, finances, or personal growth. Boundaries:  Respect for personal space, time, and individuality. Establishing these non-negotiables sets a clear standard for what you expect in a partner and protects your emotional well-being from potential compromises that could lead to resentment over time. The Importance of Defining Your Non-Negotiables 1. Clarity in Self-Reflection Before you can communicate your needs to someone else, it’s important to understand them yourself. Ask yourself: What values do I hold dear? What behaviors or attitudes will I not accept? How do I envision a respectful, supportive relationship? Taking time for introspection helps you build a clearer picture of your relationship blueprint, ensuring that you pursue connections that align with your authentic self. 2. Empowerment and Self-Worth Knowing and asserting your non-negotiables is an act of self-respect. It reminds you that your needs are valid and that you deserve a partnership that honors them. This empowerment can bolster your confidence, enabling you to set healthy boundaries and avoid settling for less than you deserve. 3. Effective Communication Once you’ve identified your non-negotiables, the next step is sharing them with potential partners. Open, honest conversations about your values and boundaries can prevent misunderstandings down the road. Remember, the right person will respect and appreciate your clarity. Steps to Define Your Non-Negotiables 1. Reflect on Past Experiences Consider your past relationships—what worked and what didn’t? Identify patterns or recurring issues. Understanding these can offer clues about what you need to change and what is non-negotiable for you in the future. 2. List Your Core Values Write down the values that are most important to you. Think about the principles that guide your decisions and shape your identity. These core values often serve as the backbone of your non-negotiables. 3. Set Clear Boundaries Establish what behaviors or circumstances you cannot tolerate. Whether it’s disrespect, dishonesty, or lack of emotional support, being clear about your boundaries will make it easier to spot red flags early on. 4. Visualize Your Ideal Relationship Imagine a partnership where both individuals thrive. What qualities would the ideal partner possess? How would they communicate, resolve conflicts, or support your personal growth? Use this vision as a benchmark for your non-negotiables. 5. Practice Assertive Communication Once you’re clear about your non-negotiables, practice expressing them assertively. Role-playing scenarios or journaling can be effective ways to build confidence in discussing these important topics with potential partners. Integrating Non-Negotiables into Your Dating Journey Screening Early:  Incorporate your non-negotiables into early conversations with potential partners. It could be as simple as asking about their views on honesty, commitment, or life goals. Mindful Observation:  Look for signs that align—or conflict—with your non-negotiables. Often, actions speak louder than words. Reevaluation:  As you grow and evolve, so might your non-negotiables. Revise and adjust them to ensure they remain true to your evolving self. Embracing the Journey Defining your non-negotiables isn’t about creating a rigid checklist; it’s about honoring yourself and cultivating a relationship that celebrates who you truly are. The right relationship will not only embrace your non-negotiables but will also inspire you to continue growing into the best version of yourself. Remember, every journey is personal. By establishing and communicating your non-negotiables, you set the stage for a partnership that’s built on mutual respect, deep understanding, and lasting connection. Happy dating!

There’s nothing quite like the gut punch of getting a text that says, “I’m not ready for anything right now,”  only to see that same person swiping away on Tinder later. It’s like being told, “It’s not you, it’s me,”  while they’re actively browsing for someone new. And honestly? That sucks. The Classic Mixed-Signal Move When someone says they’re not ready for a relationship, we usually take it at face value. We assume they need time, space, and healing—whatever the case. We respect that. But then, a wild dating profile appears. Suddenly, their need for “time”  feels like a convenient excuse rather than an honest reflection of where they’re at. Let’s be honest: why are you in the dating pool if you're not ready? Why are you entertaining new connections while telling me, “It’s just not the right time” ? It feels like a cruel joke—like someone pressing pause on you while hitting play with everyone else. The Harsh Reality: You Weren’t the One He Wasn’t Ready For This part stings, but sometimes, “I’m not ready”  means “I’m not ready for you.”  And that’s a hard pill to swallow. Because if they were genuinely uninterested in dating, they wouldn’t be on an app built specifically for that. Instead, they’re keeping their options open, waiting for something that feels  right to them—while leaving you in emotional limbo. That’s not fair. That’s not kind. And that’s not the kind of energy you need in your life. So What Do You Do? First, recognize that this says more about them than you. Someone who genuinely respects you wouldn’t feed you a line while playing the field. They wouldn’t string you with half-truths while swiping for their next distraction. Second, take this as the clarity you need. Why should you waste another second waiting around if they're looking elsewhere? Be with someone who wants  to be with you, not someone who leaves you questioning your worth. And finally, remember: you don’t have to settle for mixed signals. The right person won’t make you feel like an option—they’ll make you a priority. So, to the guy who isn’t “ready”  but somehow manages to be Tinder-ready—best of luck. But I won’t be waiting. Bye-Bye!

Domestic violence is a crisis that affects millions of people, regardless of age, gender, race, or socioeconomic status. It doesn’t just happen behind closed doors—it’s in our communities, our workplaces, and even among our friends and family. The reality is chilling, but the message must be clear: we don’t stand for it. The Reality of Domestic Violence According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), nearly 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner. But domestic violence isn’t just physical—it’s emotional, psychological, financial, and verbal. It’s about control, manipulation, and power. Victims often feel trapped, ashamed, and scared to leave. Abusers use intimidation, threats, and even financial dependence to maintain control. But silence only fuels the cycle, and the more we ignore it, the more it thrives. Breaking the Silence For too long, society has treated domestic violence as a private issue, something to be handled behind closed doors. But domestic violence is a human rights issue, a public health crisis, and a legal matter.  Speaking up can save lives. If you suspect someone is experiencing abuse, believe them. Offer support, not judgment. Please encourage them to seek professional help and resources. And if you are in an abusive situation, know that help is available, and you are not alone. Resources for Help: If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, here are resources available 24/7: National Resources (U.S.) National Domestic Violence Hotline  – Call 800-799-SAFE (7233)  or text START  to 88788 | www.thehotline.org Love Is Respect  (for young people in abusive relationships) – Call 866-331-9474 , text LOVEIS  to 22522 | www.loveisrespect.org StrongHearts Native Helpline  (for Indigenous communities) – Call 844-7NATIVE (762-8483)  | www.strongheartshelpline.org RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network)  – Call 800-656-HOPE (4673)  | www.rainn.org Futures Without Violence  – Advocacy, prevention, and policy resources | www.futureswithoutviolence.org National Center for Victims of Crime  – Legal and emotional support | www.victimsofcrime.org Resources for Women Women’s Law  – Legal support for domestic violence survivors | www.womenslaw.org WomensLaw Email Hotline  – Legal assistance through confidential emails | www.womenslaw.org/emailhotline Resources for Men The Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men & Women  – Call 888-7HELPLINE (743-5754)  | www.dahmw.org Resources for LGBTQ+ Individuals The Anti-Violence Project  – Support for LGBTQ+ individuals experiencing domestic violence – Call 212-714-1141  | www.avp.org Forge Forward  – Resources for transgender and nonbinary survivors | www.forge-forward.org International Resources UN Women  – Global efforts to end domestic violence | www.unwomen.org Canadian Women’s Foundation  – Support for survivors in Canada | www.canadianwomen.org Women’s Aid UK  – Domestic abuse services in the UK | www.womensaid.org.uk 1800RESPECT  (Australia) – National domestic, family, and sexual violence service – Call 1800 737 732  | www.1800respect.org.au We must educate, advocate, and act.  We don’t stand for domestic violence, and we won’t tolerate a culture that allows it to continue. Whether supporting survivors, demanding policy changes, or raising awareness, we all have a role to play. Let’s be the generation that ends the silence. Let’s stand together. Let's work not to lose one more person!

Breakups or Divorces are never easy. Whether you saw it coming or were blindsided, the end of a relationship can feel like a storm rolling through your life, leaving behind a mess of emotions, memories, and unanswered questions. But within the wreckage, there's an opportunity— a chance to heal, to rediscover yourself, and to come out stronger on the other side. Pain isn’t something to be rushed or ignored. You have to feel it to heal it. Allow yourself to grieve the relationship, the lost future you imagined, and the parts of yourself that were tied to your partner. Cry, journal, scream into a pillow—whatever helps you process the emotions instead of suppressing them. Crying can be one of the healthiest methods; do not hold it in, let it roll. It’s tempting to check their social media, revisit old texts, or replay memories like a highlight reel. But every time you do, you reopen the wound. Set firm boundaries with yourself—unfollow, mute, or even block if necessary. Protect your healing space. Your healing space is yours; do not let people tell you what to do; you know what you need to find yourself again; no matter what you do, you will learn from this experience. You can lean on friends and family; you don’t have to do this alone. Surround yourself with people who remind you of your worth—friends who make you laugh, family who give you perspective, or even a therapist who can help you navigate the emotional waves. Heartbreak isn’t just emotional; it’s physical, too. Get moving—take a walk, go to a yoga class, or dance around your living room. Eat foods that nourish you instead of comfort-eating your way through the pain. Sleep when you need to. Your body and mind are deeply connected, and caring for one helps heal the other. Almost every time I've felt sad, I get up and move, even during the cold. It’s easy to think about what you could have done differently, but the truth is that relationships end for a reason. Whether it was incompatibility, timing, or circumstances, dwelling on the "what ifs" will not change the outcome. Accept the lessons, not the regrets. Healing doesn’t mean you need to jump into another relationship right away. It means being open—to new experiences, to new friendships, to new love when the time is right. Your heart isn’t permanently broken; it’s just learning to beat itself again. Breakups can leave you feeling lost, but they also allow you to prioritize yourself in ways you may not have before. Show up for yourself, be kind, and remember that your happiness does not depend on someone else—it starts with you. Healing takes time, but every day is a step forward. And one day, you’ll look back and realize that this wasn’t just a heartbreak but a breakthrough. Stay strong!

This ultimate singles empowerment playlist  blends classic anthems with modern hits to remind you that being single is a strength, not a status to change: You Don’t Own Me  – Lesley Gore (1963) Hit the Road Jack  – Ray Charles (1961) Respect  – Aretha Franklin (1967) I Will Survive  – Gloria Gaynor (1978) My Life  – Billy Joel (1978) Go Your Own Way  – Fleetwood Mac (1976) Don’t Stop Me Now  – Queen (1978) I’m Still Standing  – Elton John (1983) Love Is a Battlefield  – Pat Benatar (1983) Dancing with Myself  – Billy Idol (1980) It’s Raining Men  – The Weather Girls (1982) Express Yourself  – Madonna (1989) No Scrubs  – TLC (1999) Believe  – Cher (1998) Miss Independent  – Ne-Yo (2007) Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)  – Beyoncé (2008) Since U Been Gone  – Kelly Clarkson (2004) Raise Your Glass  – P!nk (2010) So What  – P!nk (2008) Shake It Off  – Taylor Swift (2014) New Rules  – Dua Lipa (2017) Truth Hurts  – Lizzo (2019) Flowers  – Miley Cyrus (2023) Vampire  – Olivia Rodrigo (2023) Trustfall  – P!nk (2023) I Am Woman  – Emmy Meli (2021) Unstoppable  – Sia (2022) Livin’ on a Prayer  – Bon Jovi (1986) Eye of the Tiger  – Survivor (1982) Let's rock it out this National Singles Awareness Day! Because ultimately, we are all badass rockstars! xoxo Erin

Ah, Valentine’s Day. That annual love-fest where couples parade their affection while the rest of us—single yet again—brace for an avalanche of heart-shaped chocolates, overpriced flowers, and social media posts dripping with romance. If you’re rolling solo this year (again), let’s talk about how to survive and thrive  on the day dedicated to love. First of All, You’re Not Alone Statistically speaking, there are millions of single people on Valentine’s Day, so let’s ditch the notion that this is some exclusive couples-only holiday. If anything, it’s a reminder that love comes in many forms—not just the romantic kind. Redefine the Meaning of the Day Valentine’s Day is ultimately about love, including self-love, platonic love, and even the love of a good Netflix binge. Instead of feeling left out, make it a day to celebrate you . Buy flowers, treat yourself to a luxurious meal, or indulge in whatever makes you feel appreciated—because you deserve it. Host a “Singles Appreciation” Celebration If you have single friends, gather them for a fun, anti-Valentine celebration. Have a wine and cheese night, watch happily-ever-after-free  movies, or exchange “Galentine’s” or “Palentine’s” gifts. Make it a night of laughter and camaraderie instead of moping. Treat Yourself Like You’d Want a Partner to Treat You Why not do it yourself instead of waiting for someone else to spoil you? Order your favorite dessert, book a spa treatment, buy that gift you’ve been eyeing—because you’re just as worthy of love and care as anyone in a relationship. Unplug from Social Media (If You Need To) Scrolling through a feed filled with candlelit dinners and gushy captions might not be your vibe. Instead, allow yourself to avoid constant reminders and focus on genuine connections. Call a friend, go on an adventure, or spend time doing something that brings you joy. Remember: Being Single can be great! Society often highlights Valentine’s Day as a celebration of couples, but being single isn’t a setback—it’s an exciting chapter in your journey. It’s a time of growth, self-discovery, and the freedom to shape your life exactly how you want. Every experience, whether shared or solo, brings you closer to the people and moments that truly align with your happiness. So this Valentine’s Day, instead of feeling “single again,” think of it as another opportunity to love yourself, celebrate your independence, and embrace the possibilities ahead. After all, the best love story you’ll ever have starts with you.

Co-parenting with an ex can feel like navigating a minefield—one wrong step, and BOOM. Emotions flare, misunderstandings happen, and suddenly, your once peaceful day is anything but. One of the biggest mistakes people make? Using the kids as messengers, leverage, or emotional support. Your children deserve to be just that—kids. They shouldn't be responsible for passing messages, refereeing conflicts, or carrying the weight of your frustrations. So, how do you communicate effectively with your ex without dragging the kids into the mix? Here are the best ways to keep things clear, civil, and—most importantly—kid-free. 1. Use a Co-Parenting App There are several co-parenting apps designed to streamline communication and minimize conflict. Apps like OurFamilyWizard, Talking Parents, and Cozi  allow you to schedule visits, track expenses, and send messages without miscommunication. Bonus? The messages are time-stamped and can't be altered, which helps keep things accountable and drama-free. 2. Stick to Business Treat your communication like a business transaction. Keep emotions out of it. Stick to the facts, be direct, and avoid unnecessary personal commentary. If you wouldn’t say it in an email to a colleague, don’t tell your ex. Example: "I can't believe you forgot to pick up Johnny again. You're so irresponsible!" ✅ "Johnny's pick-up was at 3:00 PM today. Can we confirm future times to avoid confusion?" 3. Email Over Text Texts can be impulsive and emotionally charged, leading to misinterpretation and heated arguments. Email allows for more thought-out responses and provides a written record. If you must text, keep it short, clear, and only about logistics. 4. Establish Boundaries Set clear guidelines for communication: No calling or texting after a specific time unless it's an emergency. No discussing personal lives—stick to parenting matters. No engaging in arguments via text. If tensions rise, take a step back and respond later. Boundaries protect your mental peace and prevent unnecessary conflict. 5. Designate a Neutral Third Party (If Necessary) If direct communication is impossible without tension, consider using a mutual friend, family member, or mediator for essential discussions. This works well in high-conflict situations where every exchange turns into a battle. 6. Use a Shared Calendar Instead of constant back-and-forth texts about schedules, keep everything in one place. Google Calendar, Cozi, or a shared paper planner can help keep track of school events, vacations, and custody schedules without unnecessary conversations. 7. Keep It Short and Sweet Less is more when dealing with an ex. Keep messages brief and to the point. The more words, the higher the chances of misinterpretation. If they send a long, emotional message, don’t match their energy. Reply with only what’s necessary. 8. Don’t Vent to Your Kids Your kids should never be your sounding board regarding your ex. Call a friend, talk to a therapist, or write in a journal if you need to vent. Your child should never feel they must take sides or fix your problems. 9. Focus on the Goal The goal is to co-parent effectively. It’s not about who “wins” the conversation or proving a point. It’s about raising happy, healthy kids in a stable environment. If a message isn’t productive, don’t send it. 10. Know When to Walk Away Not every message requires an immediate response. If your ex is pushing your buttons, take a deep breath, step away, and reply when you’re calm. Silence can be powerful when used wisely. Co-parenting isn’t always easy, but keeping your communication clean, respectful, and kid-free will make it smoother for everyone involved. Your kids deserve to be shielded from adult conflicts, and by handling things maturely, you set an example of how to deal with challenging situations gracefully. And if your ex refuses to cooperate? Keep doing your part. Lead by example. Your kids will thank you for it.

In today’s world, we’re constantly surrounded by diverse perspectives. Whether it’s family discussions, debates with friends, or conversations at work, we often encounter differing opinions. Navigating these differences isn’t always easy, but learning to handle them gracefully and understanding is key to building stronger relationships and a more tolerant society. Here are some essential tips for embracing and navigating differences of opinion. Approach with an Open Mind: It’s natural to want to defend your beliefs, but approaching discussions with curiosity rather than defensiveness can open new doors. Instead of focusing on why someone disagrees, try to understand their perspective. Asking questions like, “What led you to that opinion?” or “Can you share more about your experience?” can deepen your understanding and show respect. Recognize the Difference Between Facts and Opinions: Sometimes, conversations get heated because we confuse opinions with facts. A fact is a verifiable truth, whereas an opinion is a personal belief. By keeping this distinction in mind, we can engage more thoughtfully and avoid unnecessary arguments. Respecting others’ rights to their opinions, even if you disagree, is essential in fostering mutual respect. Embrace Empathy: Putting yourself in someone else’s shoes can be transformative. Empathy doesn’t mean you have to agree, but it allows you to connect with the person behind the opinion. Acknowledging the emotions or experiences that shape someone’s beliefs can lead to more compassionate, constructive conversations. Know When to Agree to Disagree : Not every conversation will end in consensus, and that’s okay. Sometimes, the best outcome is to acknowledge that you see things differently. Recognizing that it’s OK to leave specific discussions unresolved is part of mature communication. This approach can preserve relationships, especially when the topic is not central to the relationship itself. Avoid Labels and Stereotypes : When disagreements arise, it’s easy to label or stereotype those with differing views. This can create an “us versus them” mentality, eroding trust and making meaningful dialogue harder. Instead of seeing people as “right” or “wrong,” view them as complex individuals with their own stories and experiences. Be Willing to Change Your Perspective: It’s rare, but not impossible, that we might change our opinions after hearing new viewpoints. Being open to shifting your perspective, even slightly, can be liberating and lead to growth. At the very least, it shows the other person that you value their input and are committed to personal growth. Set Boundaries: Some topics can be particularly sensitive or triggering. Setting boundaries around discussions that could lead to unnecessary conflict can be beneficial. It’s okay to tell someone, “I’d prefer not to discuss this,” or “Let’s focus on what we agree on.” Healthy boundaries can preserve relationships and keep conversations positive. Remember the Bigger Picture: Often, our disagreements are a small part of a much larger relationship. Focusing on what you share with someone rather than what divides you can help you see things in perspective. When we value relationships over being “right,” we’re better equipped to handle differences in a way that enriches our connections. Differences in opinion are natural, and navigating them well can be a rewarding experience. By engaging with curiosity, empathy, and respect, we can turn potential conflicts into opportunities for connection, learning, and growth. After all, our relationships are strengthened not by our similarities but by how well we respect and embrace our differences. How do you handle or did you handle the differences in your most recent or past relationships?

Let’s face it, when you have family surrounding you during and post-divorce, it's wise to ensure they're supportive and NOT getting out of line. This is your life and your situation, not theirs. But families are complicated, and depending on how many siblings, parents, step-parents, grandparents, cousins, etc., you surround yourself with, everyone has an opinion, and few of them have filters when it comes to adding their two cents worth. How often have I heard “hear me out” from loving family members who have listened to my stories and either immediately commented or thought about it? At least 100. And whether they tell you what they believe in the moment or later on, trust me, they WILL voice their opinion. Whether you agree with their comments, here's the deal: Stick to your standards and your comfort level. And as we enter the holiday season - hallelujah to those who can jet off somewhere family-free! - most of us will face family members, those who are supportive and those who are not. Take some time beforehand to think about how you will handle unwanted opinions of your current situation when you're all together. It’s easy to fly off the handle when people tell you crap you don't want to hear, but bite your lip, keep your cool and focus on what's best for everyone. You'll thank yourself after it's all said and done. Here are a few things you can say to help you through these times. My advice: memorize them! “I appreciate your concern, and I hear you." “We want to keep this part of our divorce private." “I know you love me and want the best; thank you for being here." If someone shames your ex: “I understand your concerns about (insert name); however, we're working together to do what's best for everyone." “Though this is difficult for everyone to understand, we know you care and love us, which I really appreciate.” “I want to enjoy the holidays, and I’m taking it daily. I want to enjoy this time with the family rather than talk about the details of my divorce.” “Thank you for being here for me, but I'd rather not discuss the past right now.” Then turn it around and ask about THEM. Redirection works wonders! Remember to hang tough because everyone has an opinion, and you must ensure that while they may have good intentions, you create boundaries when discussing your situation. For Pete's sake, it's your life, not theirs. OK, that stated, I wanna know your favorite: Traditional turkey with all the trimmings or made-from-scratch, 5-layer lasagna?!

Divorce is one of those life experiences that you can never fully understand until you’re in it. No matter how many movies you’ve watched, friends you’ve supported, or advice you’ve gathered, the reality is often different—and much more complicated. Here are eight things you don’t realize about divorce until you go through it. 1. It’s Not Just a Legal Process—It’s an Emotional Marathon Most people focus on the legal side of divorce—dividing assets, custody agreements, and paperwork. But the emotional weight of it all is just as challenging, if not more. It’s a rollercoaster of grief, relief, anxiety, and sometimes, unexpected joy. 2. Your Identity Takes a Hit Divorce can leave you questioning who you are outside of your marriage. Your routines, your last name (maybe), your traditions—all of it changes. Even if the marriage wasn’t great, the shift in identity can be jarring. 3. Friends Will Disappear (And Some Will Surprise You) Divorce has a way of shaking up your social circle. Some people will pull away, whether because they feel uncomfortable or don’t know what to say. Others, maybe those you weren’t even that close to before, will step up in ways you never expected. 4. You’ll Second-Guess Yourself More Than You Thought Even if you’re 100% sure divorce was the right decision, there will still be moments of doubt. The loneliness, the ‘what-ifs,’ and the fear of the unknown can creep in unexpectedly. 5. Holidays Will Feel Different—And That’s Hard The first birthday, the first Christmas, and the first anniversary of what would’ve been another year of marriage feel different. Sometimes, it’s sad. Other times, it’s a relief. But no matter what, it’s an adjustment. 6. Dating Again Is Both Terrifying and Exciting Whether you wait years or jump in quickly, re-entering the dating world after divorce is a new experience. The rules have changed, you’ve changed, and sometimes, it feels like learning to walk all over again. 7. Your Ex Will Move On—And That Might Sting Even if you don’t want them back, seeing your ex with someone new can hit you differently than expected. It’s a reminder that life is moving forward—for both of you. 8. You’ll Become Stronger in Ways You Never Imagined Divorce reshapes you. You learn to make decisions on your own, trust yourself again, and build a new life that’s yours. It may be one of the hardest things you go through, but it can also be the beginning of something beautiful. Divorce is more than just a breakup—it’s a complete life transition. The things you don’t expect often end up teaching you the most. If you’re in the middle or on the other side, know you’re not alone. You’re growing, even in the moments that feel impossible. We are thinking about you! Erin Let's Dish: What is something that you realize after your divorce? What is one thing you would tell someone considering divorce? What was the most challenging part?

Divorce is often framed as a chapter that eventually closes—a wound that heals with time. You move forward, find new routines, create a new sense of self, and, hopefully, embrace new beginnings. But what happens when, years later, you still feel the sting of what was lost? When memories resurface unexpectedly, or when a familiar pang of sadness or anger creeps in, catching you off guard? The truth is that healing from divorce isn’t always linear. Just because the papers are signed, the assets divided, and life has moved on doesn’t mean the emotional impact disappears on a set timeline. Sometimes, it lingers. Sometimes, it reappears when you least expect it—at your child’s graduation, when you hear a particular song, when an old friend mentions your ex’s name, or even when you struggle with new relationships. Why Does the Hurt Linger? Unresolved Feelings: You may think you've processed everything, but emotions have layers. Unresolved grief, anger, or sadness may resurface differently as you evolve. Memories and Nostalgia: No matter how bad a marriage ended, it wasn’t all bad. Moments of love, laughter, and shared experiences shaped you. Nostalgia can sometimes trick you into remembering what was good, making the loss feel fresh again. Milestones and Life Events: Seeing your children grow, facing birthdays and anniversaries alone, or watching your ex move on can all serve as reminders of what used to be. Even if you no longer want that relationship, the loss of the life you once imagined can still sting. Triggers and Unexpected Reminders: A place, a smell, a holiday, a social media post—small things can bring back big emotions. You may not even realize something is a trigger until it happens. Comparison and Doubt: Maybe your ex has remarried, and you haven’t. Maybe they seem happy, and you still feel like you’re picking up the pieces. Comparison can be a cruel thief of joy, making you question your healing and progress. How to Cope with Lingering Hurt Acknowledge That It’s normal. There is no timeline for healing. Grief and pain can resurface years later, and that doesn’t mean you’re stuck or failing. It means you’re human. Allow Yourself to Feel: Pushing emotions away often makes them stronger. Instead of burying the hurt, sit with it. Write about it, talk to a friend, or seek therapy. Redefine Your Growth: Healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means learning to carry the past without letting it weigh you down. Look at how far you’ve come instead of where you think you “should” be. Create New Associations: If certain places or dates bring you pain, create new traditions and memories to replace them. Find ways to regain your joy. Practice Self-Compassion: Divorce changes you, and it’s okay if you’re still healing. Be gentle with yourself. You are not weak for feeling pain years later—you are simply still processing a loss that mattered. Divorce is not just a breakup; it’s a shift in identity, family, and plans. And sometimes, no matter how much time has passed, the echoes of that loss still linger. But that doesn’t mean you haven’t moved on or are broken. It simply means you loved, lost, and felt deeply—and that’s nothing to be ashamed of. Healing isn’t about erasing the past; it’s about learning to carry it in a way that no longer controls your future. If you still feel the pain years later, you’re not alone. Keep going. Keep growing. The pain may visit, but it doesn’t have to stay. xoxo Erin Dish: Think about who you can reach out to when you feel pain. What best can you do for yourself as you transition and heal? What would you tell someone that is recently divorced?

Our blog discusses self-care and ensuring you do not burn the candle at both ends. However, being a single parent can zap you to the core in zero seconds. It is the food, laundry, cleaning, clothing needed, medical bills, a roof over your and their head/s, and more. Even if you have the best co-parent situation – sharing responsibilities yet running two different households simultaneously (let’s be honest) is hard. Here are some ideas for navigating life as a single parent and winning: 1) Give it up. Let your groceries be delivered. Plan out your days you have your kids, plan meals, and order only what you need. This is a huge time suck if not. 2) Hire someone to help you keep up with the deep cleaning of your house – find a way to spend a little bit extra for this peace of mind. 3) Plan family fun time and feed off the energy of your kids. That quality time is something they and you will always cherish. 4) Then plan your time and stick to it. Even if you miss a game or two, you must take care of yourself. You will be a better parent because of it. 5) Give your kids chores – possibly similar chores in both households. Children can feel empowered knowing it’s their job to clean the living room, etc. 6) Carpooling: If multiple children are on different teams, see if you can figure out a carpool. It doesn’t mean anything, but you are efficient with your time. 7) Daily: Meditate. Just try it. It can ground you and allow you to focus on the tasks. Navigating life without a co-pilot is challenging at best. Learn not to overcommit yourself; it’s ok to say NO; I just need time for myself.