Let’s just get this out of the way: standing someone up isn’t mysterious, edgy, or powerful. It’s not a “statement.” It’s not “protecting your energy.” It’s not a flex. It’s embarrassing. For you . Somehow, flaking became normal. Ghosting got rebranded as “boundaries.” Disappearing now passes for emotional intelligence. Basic discourtesy is mistaken for confidence. It isn’t. Standing someone up, especially in dating, doesn't make you interesting or desirable. It directly undermines basic respect and reveals unreliability and disregard for others. Let’s Talk About What Actually Happens You don’t just skip a date. You skip effort, respect, and decency. Someone got ready, adjusted their schedule, and showed up—on time and hopeful—in a world where vulnerability is a risk. And you? You vanished. No text. No explanation. No accountability. That doesn’t make you elusive. It makes your lack of courtesy unmistakable. “I Didn’t Owe Them Anything” — Sure, But… This is the favorite line of people who don’t like being called out. No, you don’t owe someone your life story. No, you don’t owe them forever. But once you agree  to show up, you owe them the smallest courtesy imaginable: communication. A simple text. A cancellation. Even an awkward “Hey, I’m not feeling this anymore.” That’s not emotional labor. That’s basic human decency. If sending a sentence feels like too much, dating is not your arena right now. Standing Someone Up Is Loud—Even in Silence Here’s the part people don’t like to admit: when you stand someone up, you reveal far more about yourself than you do about them. You show that: You avoid discomfort rather than handle it. You prioritize your momentary feelings over someone else’s time. You lack follow-through. You confuse disappearing with strength. And trust me—people notice. Dating circles are smaller than you think. Reputations travel faster than texts. The person you stood up to today might be the friend of someone you want tomorrow. And nothing kills attraction faster than, “Oh yeah… I’ve heard about them.” And Let’s Be Clear: Life Happens… But Patterns Speak Yes, emergencies happen. Phones die. Schedules explode. That’s real life. But disappearing without follow-up? Never acknowledging it? Acting as if nothing happened? That’s not bad luck—that’s a choice. One mistake can be explained. A pattern becomes a personality. The Irony No One Talks About Here’s the wild part: people who stand others up often complain the loudest about being ghosted, ignored, or “not taken seriously.” You can’t demand respect if you don’t practice. You can’t want clarity while offering confusion. You can’t crave effort while giving none. Dating is not about flawlessness. It's about showing up and participating with integrity. If You’re Going to Date, Be Brave Enough to Be Decent You don’t have to say yes to everyone. You don’t have to feel sparks. You don’t have to continue something that isn’t right. But if you say you’ll show up, show up. Or  at the very least, show respect. Standing someone up doesn’t make a statement—it signals you disregard basic respect. It makes you someone people quietly warn others about. Let your actions reflect your respect for others, because being decent and communicative is remembered far more than silence. If you want to build a reputation worth having, start by being honest, clear, and present. That’s how you leave a legacy you can be proud of. If this resonated, take it as a sign: showing up and communicating are the real marks of maturity. Remember, growth comes from facing discomfort and choosing respect.

Divorce already rearranges the furniture of family life. Roles shift. Schedules change. Traditions get rewritten. And most families accept that—because they have to. But there’s a difference between adjusting and disconnecting. One of the hardest post-divorce realities to navigate is when priorities shift for only one parent, and suddenly the balance that held the family together starts to tilt. What was once shared responsibility becomes uneven. What was once consistent becomes uncertain. And what was once teamwork becomes a quiet tug-of-war, the kids never asked to be part of. The Shift Isn’t Always Loud—but It’s Felt These shifts don’t always come with dramatic announcements. Often, they arrive subtly: Missed pickups that turn into “Can you cover for me?” Phone calls answered late—or not at all A new relationship, job, lifestyle, or social life that slowly takes center stage I am going on a trip, take prescendt to I want to be with my kids Individually, these moments may seem harmless. Life happens. People grow. Circumstances. Individually, these moments might seem harmless. Life happens. People grow. Circumstances change. But together? They send a message, especially to children, that priorities have been shifted. But collectively? They send a message, especially to children, that priorities have been reordered. Kids Notice Everything (Even When They Don’t Say It) Children are incredibly perceptive. They may not have the language to articulate what’s changed, but they feel it in their nervous systems. They notice: Who shows up consistently Who remembers the details Who rearranges their life for them and who expects them to adjust When one parent disengages, the emotional weight often shifts to the other parent or, worse, onto the child. Kids may start: Over-functioning to “be easier.” Downplaying their needs Acting out to reclaim attention Internalizing the belief that they aren’t a priority And that belief doesn’t disappear when childhood ends. The Parent Left Holding It All For the parent who stays steady, the emotional burden can be draining. You become: • The default parent • The emotional anchor • The schedule keeper • The explainer • The one handling disappointment—yours and theirs And while you may do it willingly, lovingly, and without complaint, it doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. There’s a quiet grief in realizing you’re carrying the weight alone, not because the other parent can’t, but because they won’t. When “Their Choice” Becomes Everyone’s Consequence Here’s the truth many people avoid saying out loud: When one parent reprioritizes their life without accounting for their children, the entire family feels the impact. The family absorbs the impact. It affects: The child’s sense of security The co-parenting dynamic The emotional labor required to keep things stable The long-term trust between parent and child And while adults are entitled to rebuild, rediscover themselves, and move forward after divorce, parenthood doesn’t pause during personal reinvention. Growth doesn’t excuse absence. What the Present Parent Can (and Can’t) Do You cannot control another parent’s priorities. You can control the environment you create. That looks like: Maintaining routines and reliability Validating your child’s feelings without villainizing the other parent Avoiding overcompensation that burns you out Modeling emotional consistency and boundaries Most importantly, it means remembering this: One consistent, emotionally present parent can still raise secure, resilient children. You matter. Your presence matters. Your effort matters. The Long View Children grow up. They reflect. They connect dots. They will remember: Who showed up when it was inconvenient Who kept promises Who made them feel safe—even during disappointment Priorities tell a story. Over time, kids learn to read it clearly. And while it’s painful when only one parent carries the weight, it’s also powerful because presence leaves a lasting imprint. If you’re the parent holding it together while someone else drifts—this isn’t your failure. It’s your strength. And if you’re the parent whose priorities have shifted—there’s still time to realign. Children don’t need perfection. They need presence. Families don’t fall apart when life changes. They fracture when the connection becomes weak. Families don’t fall apart when life changes. They break when the connection becomes optional. Please know there is still time to step up; however, if you do not later in life, you will have consequences, sadly. xoxo Erin

Seasonal depression sneaks up on you like that guest who shows up after daylight saving time and doesn’t leave until March. One minute you’re okay, and the next you’re gazing out the window at 4:47 p.m., wondering if it’s too early to go to bed… forever. But here’s the deal: while seasonal depression is real and heavy, sometimes laughter is the life raft that keeps you going. Not the fake “everything is fine” laugh, but the kind that says, “This is ridiculous, and I’m allowed to find humor in surviving it.” When the Sun Sets at 5 p.m., So Does Your Motivation It’s humbling to feel tired before dinner. You haven’t done anything, yet your body insists it’s time for bed. Productivity? Out the window. Ambition? Taking a winter break. Laugh about it. Make jokes about becoming a hibernating bear. Dramatically announce that you’re “entering your Victorian-era fainting phase.” Humor doesn’t erase the fatigue, but it prevents it from taking over. Dark Humor Counts as Humor If your humor gets a little darker in winter, congrats—you’re human. Sometimes laughing sounds like, “Wow, my serotonin really said, ‘see ya in spring.’” That’s cool. Gallows humor is still humor. It’s not minimizing pain; it’s acknowledging it without letting it take over. Laughter can coexist with struggle. They’re not mutually exclusive. Laughing at the Small Wins Seasonal depression tries to tell you that if you didn’t conquer the world today, you failed. So let’s redefine success: You showered? Round of applause. You answered one email? Iconic. You wore real pants instead of pajama bottoms? Truly heroic. Laugh at how low the bar gets—and then celebrate clearing it anyway. Find the Ridiculous Where You Can Winter sadness thrives in silence and isolation. Laughter breaks both. Watch the dumb show. Rewatch the sitcom you already know the ending to. Send the crazy meme to the group chat. Joy doesn’t have to be productive. It just has to show up. You’re Not Weak—You’re Weathering Something Seasonal depression isn’t a personality flaw. It’s chemistry, light, rhythm, and biology coming together at the worst time of year. If humor helps you cope, that doesn’t mean you’re avoiding the issue — it means you’re managing it in a way that feels doable. And some days, survival means laughing at yourself while eating soup for the third night in a row because it seems like the only acceptable winter meal. Laughing Is Not the Cure—But It’s a Tool Let’s be honest: laughter doesn’t replace therapy, medication, sunlight, or support. But it does offer some breathing room. It reminds you that you’re still here, still yourself, still capable of joy — even if that joy is just laughing at how dramatic winter makes everything feel. So laugh when you can. Laugh when it feels wrong. Laugh when it’s the only thing you have left in your emotional toolkit that day. Because if seasonal depression insists on showing up every year, you might as well bring humor to the fight.

At some point, many of us realize we don’t just struggle to trust romantic partners  anymore we struggle to trust people, period. Friends. Coworkers. Family. Strangers. Even the versions of people we thought we knew. And it’s not because we suddenly became bitter or closed off. It’s because life—divorce included—has shown us that people are complicated, inconsistent, and sometimes deeply disappointing. When Trust Breaks, It Doesn’t Stay in One Lane Here’s the thing no one really talks about: when trust breaks in a big way, it doesn’t stay neatly contained. A divorce might be the catalyst, but the ripple effect touches everything. You start questioning: Who actually means what they say? Who is showing up because they care—and who is showing up because it’s convenient? Who disappears when things get uncomfortable? Who is only supportive when it costs them nothing? Once you’ve been let down by people who promised they wouldn’t let you down, blind trust stops making sense. Trusting People Used to Feel Simpler There was a time when trust felt automatic. You assumed people were honest. You believed effort meant intention. You took words at face value. Now? You notice patterns. You read between the lines. You pause before opening up. That’s not negativity. That’s experience. And experience has taught you that not everyone who smiles is safe—and not everyone who promises keeps their word. Trust Isn’t About Assuming the Worst Distrust doesn’t mean you think everyone is out to hurt you. It means you understand that people are human—and humans are capable of letting you down. Trusting people now looks like: Letting actions matter more than apologies Allowing access slowly instead of all at once Keeping expectations realistic instead of idealistic Accepting that someone can be “nice” and still not reliable You can believe in people without  putting them on a pedestal. The Quiet Grief of Losing Faith in People One of the hardest parts about struggling to trust people overall is the sadness that comes with it. Not anger—sadness. The sadness of realizing: Some people were only meant for a season Some relationships were built on convenience, not care Some loyalty was one-sided Some kindness came with conditions That realization changes you. And it’s okay to mourn the version of yourself who believed more easily. Relearning How to Trust—Without Losing Yourself Trusting people again doesn’t mean going back to who you were. It means evolving. It means: Being open but observant Kind but boundaried Hopeful but grounded Willing to connect without abandoning discernment You don’t have to assume people are bad. You just don’t have to assume they’re safe either. You don’t need to assume people are bad. You also don’t have to assume they’re safe. Trust is something people earn through consistency, not something they automatically receive. Trust becomes something people earn through consistency, not something they’re automatically given. Learning to trust people again isn’t about hardening your heart—it’s about protecting your peace. You can still believe in good people while acknowledging that not everyone is capable of being one to you . Trust doesn’t mean access. And boundaries don’t mean bitterness. They mean you’ve learned. And learning is not something to apologize for.

Somewhere along the way, being single turned into a group project filled with unsolicited opinions. “Are you seeing anyone?” “You’ll meet someone when you stop looking.” “My cousin’s friend met her husband at Target.” Thank you, very helpful. I’ll go ahead and add “romantic destiny, aisle 12” to my to‑do list. But here’s the truth no one talks about enough: being single isn’t a problem to solve. It’s a season to survive, enjoy, and occasionally laugh through— one day at a time . The Art of the 24-Hour Commitment: When you’re single, “taking things day by day” isn’t a sign of a lack of ambition. It’s a survival tactic. Some days you’re thriving: • You meal prep. • You work out. • You feel emotionally stable and possibly unstoppable. Other days: • You eat cereal for dinner. • You cry over a song you weren’t even dating. • You consider texting someone who should remain in the Witness Protection Program. Try to think about this: you don’t need a five-year plan. You need a plan for today. And sometimes, that plan is simply: don’t spiral. Single Math Is Different When you’re in a relationship, people ask, “Where is this going?” When you’re single, the math changes: Did I get out of bed? ✔️ Did I answer one email? ✔️ Did I resist the urge to romanticize a stranger who held the door open? Mostly ✔️ That’s progress. We don’t measure success in milestones anymore—we measure it in emotional stability and clean laundry . Healing Is Not Linear (It’s More Like a Drunk Squirrel) One day, you feel healed. The next day, you’re mad about something that happened three relationships ago. That’s not failure. That’s being human. Taking things day by day means: Letting yourself feel it without overanalyzing it. Not forcing closure just to feel “caught up.” Accepting that healing shows up differently on different days. Some days you’re reflective and calm. Other days, you’re angry and googling “why do men” at 11:47 p.m. Both are valid. You’re Not Behind—You’re Just Living Offline Being single often feels like everyone else got a secret timeline you missed. Engagements, weddings, babies, anniversaries… meanwhile, you’re celebrating: Canceling plans A good night’s sleep Not sharing your snacks But life isn’t a race. It’s a weird, winding path where sometimes the win is simply not settling for the wrong thing. Taking things day by day reminds you that your life is happening right now, not someday when someone else shows up. Small Joys Are the Whole Point When you stop obsessing over “what’s next,” you start noticing: Morning coffee that actually tastes good Laughing way too hard at your own jokes is peace instead of chaos, I say to myself I'm so funny all the time :) The freedom to change your mind without explanation These aren’t filler moments. They’re the main event. Today Is Enough You don’t need to have it all figured out. You don’t need to be “ready” for anything. You don’t need to know who’s coming next. You just need to show up today. Because some days, being single means growth. Some days it means rest. Some days it means eating dessert first. And honestly? That sounds like a pretty solid life to me; take life, one day at a time. 💛 or not... You do you and do it unapologetically. xoxo Erin and for your entertainment: A drunk squirrel:

Once upon a time, I tolerated dating games. The guessing.The waiting. The “he watched my story but didn’t text me” math. That version of me had free time and low standards. She is no longer available. No, sir, you cannot play games with me anymore. If your communication style requires decoding, a crystal ball, or a group chat of friends to interpret, please know I will be exiting quietly and blocking loudly. I’m not asking for daily poems or carrier pigeons. I’m asking for: Consistency Clarity And the bare minimum of adult behavior If your energy is hot one day and cold the next, congratulations, you’ve invented emotional whiplash. I do not have insurance for that. And let’s be clear: If I wanted confusion, I’d rewatch my ex explain “what he meant.” I’m in my bad ass woman era . I eat dinner at a reasonable hour. I go to bed on time. I do not stay up wondering what a text meant. So no sir.If you want to play games, download one. If you wish to attract attention without effort, try a mirror. If you want access to me, show up like you mean it. This is not an audition. This is the final cut. Just do not do this to me or anyone...Thank you sir!

If 2025 were a person, it would be that friend who says, “Trust me, this will be good for you,”  and then immediately hands you emotional whiplash, a plot twist, and a bill you weren’t expecting. This year had a lot of audacity . It tested patience.It tested boundaries. It tested how many times one person can say, “Wow, that wasn’t on my bingo card.” So before we close the book on 2025, let’s pause and ask the fundamental question: How are you feeling about this year—honestly? Not the polite answer.Not the “I’m fine” answer.The real  answer. Because if your response includes a deep sigh, a nervous laugh, or “well…,” you’re not alone. Divorcee Edition: Why This Year Felt Extra Spicy For divorcees, time works differently. One minute you’re thriving, the next you’re crying over something completely unrelated, like a song in the grocery store or the fact that no one ate the leftovers you saved. Maybe 2025 was the year you: Realized healing is not a straight line—it’s more like a drunk squirrel Thought you were “over it”… until you weren’t Got really good at doing things alone and surprisingly okay with it Learned that growth often shows up disguised as mild chaos Progress this year may not have looked glamorous. It probably looked more like emotional stretch pants . Staying Positive (Without Lying to Yourself) Let’s be clear: staying positive does not  mean pretending 2025 was magical. If it was magical, it was the kind of magic where something disappears—usually your patience. Here’s how to keep it light while still moving forward: Laugh at the Plot Twists If you don’t laugh, you’ll spiral. 2025 proved that life loves a surprise ending, and not all of them need to be taken personally. Redefine Success Success this year might have been: Not texting back Leaving earlier than planned Finally saying “no” Or simply not crying in public (much) These are wins. Stop Romanticizing “Where You Should Be.” If you had a dollar for every time you thought you’d be “further along by now,” you’d be financially healed. But life doesn’t follow a Pinterest board—it follows vibes, lessons, and timing we don’t control. Accept That Optimism Can Be Sarcastic You don’t have to be glowing with positivity. Sometimes optimism sounds like: “Well… that was terrible. But I survived.” Still counts. . So Let’s End 2025 With This Before we let the clock flip the year again, take a moment to ask yourself: What moments this year taught you something real? Where did you stand up for yourself, even when it scared you? What patterns showed up that you’re now ready to leave behind? What didn’t  work — and what does that mean for how you want to be treated moving forward? You don’t need a perfectly wrapped ending to close out the year. You need to recognize that you made it through. You learned things you didn’t ask to learn. You handled situations you didn’t want to handle. And you became someone who knows themselves a little better—whether you like it or not. So if you’re closing out 2025 feeling stronger, softer, wiser, funnier, more tired, or all of the above—congratulations. You did the work. Here’s to stepping into whatever comes next with humor, boundaries, and the understanding that healing doesn’t mean being serious all the time. Sometimes it just means laughing and saying: “Well… that was a year.” — Divorcee Dish

There’s something oddly comforting—and painfully familiar—about Surviving the Holidays when you watch it as an adult, especially if you’re divorced. On the surface, it’s a chaotic holiday comedy. Awkward family dinners. Forced cheer. People pretending everything is fine when it clearly isn’t. But beneath the jokes is something more profound: a story about loneliness during a season that’s supposed to feel full—and what happens when the magic you once relied on no longer shows up the way it used to. When you’re younger, magic happens . It lives in traditions you didn’t have to plan, families that felt permanent, and the assumption that someone would always be there on Christmas morning. You didn’t question it. You didn’t budget emotional energy for it. You just showed up. After divorce, the magic doesn’t disappear—it fractures. Suddenly, Christmas is quieter. Or louder in the wrong ways. Maybe you’re negotiating schedules instead of decorating together. Perhaps the house feels too big—or painfully empty. Maybe the traditions you loved now belong to a life that no longer exists. In Surviving Christmas , the main character literally tries to buy a family for the holidays. It’s funny, but it’s also heartbreaking—because it captures that exact feeling: I don’t want the presents; I want the belonging. Divorce Changes the Texture of Joy What no one really talks about is how divorce doesn’t just take a relationship—it reshapes how joy feels. Holiday joy used to be layered: Anticipation Shared memories Familiar rituals Someone witnessing the moment with  you After a divorce, joy often feels thinner. Still there—but quieter. Less reliable. You may feel guilty for not feeling festive enough. Or pressured to “make it magical” for others while quietly grieving what you lost. And grief doesn’t stop just because the calendar says it’s time to celebrate. Watching Surviving Christmas  as a divorced adult hits differently because the awkwardness is no longer exaggerated—it’s recognizable. The forced conversations.The pretending.The sense of being out of place even when surrounded by people. That’s the reality for so many divorced adults during the holidays. You’re present, but not entirely comfortable. Smiling, but monitoring your emotions. Trying to honor the season without reopening wounds. It’s not that you’re bitter. It’s that you’re changed. Losing the Old Magic Doesn’t Mean You’re Broken Here’s the part that matters most: losing the old magic doesn’t mean you’re incapable of joy—it means you’re in transition. The magic you had before was built on certainty: Certainty of roles Certainty of family structure Certainty of who you’d wake up next to After a divorce, certainty is gone. And magic doesn’t thrive in uncertainty—it has to be rebuilt. That takes time. And honesty. And permission to admit that some years won’t feel the way you hoped. If Surviving Christmas  teaches us anything beneath the comedy, it’s this: the longing for connection never goes away—but it can change shape. The new magic might look like: A quiet morning without expectations Creating traditions that are yours , not inherited Letting go of perfection Finding warmth in chosen family, not just biological ones It’s subtler. Softer. Less cinematic. But it’s real. And maybe the actual loss isn’t the magic itself—but the belief that magic is supposed to look the same forever. If the holidays feel different now—if Surviving Christmas  feels a little too relatable—you’re not failing the season. You’re surviving it. And sometimes, that’s the bravest kind of magic there is.

Dating after a relationship—whether it was long-term, short-term, serious, or complicated—can feel like stepping back into unfamiliar territory. You’re wiser, more cautious, and probably more precise about what you want. And then it happens. A message that sparks hope.A compliment that feels intentional.A connection that seems promising until it stalls. If the interest never quite turns into effort, you may be dealing with breadcrumbing. What Breadcrumbing Really Is Breadcrumbing is when someone gives you small, sporadic bits of attention to keep you engaged, but never enough to move things forward. They text occasionally. They check in “just because.”They flirt, react to your stories, or say they miss you. But they don’t make plans. They don’t follow through. They don’t build anything consistent. Breadcrumbing creates the illusion  of interest without the substance of it. Why People Breadcrumb People breadcrumb for many reasons—but the common thread is avoidance. Here are some of the most frequent ones: 1. They enjoy the validation. Your attention reassures them. Your responses feed their ego. But they aren’t invested in a real connection. 2. They want access without commitment. Breadcrumbing keeps the door open on their terms—low effort, low responsibility. 3. They’re emotionally unavailable. They like connection in theory, but distance in practice. Breadcrumbs feel safer than vulnerability. 4. They’re unsure of what they want. Instead of taking time to figure it out, they keep people loosely attached while they decide. 5. They don’t want to be honest. Fading in and out feels easier than saying, “I’m not interested in pursuing this.” None of these reasons requires you to wait around. Why Breadcrumbing Feels So Confusing Breadcrumbing thrives on mixed signals. When you start to detach, they reappear. When you’re ready to move on, they say something that pulls you back in. It’s not enough to feel secure—but it’s enough to keep you questioning yourself. That confusion is the point. Healthy interest brings clarity. Breadcrumbing keeps things ambiguous. How to Catch Breadcrumbing Early Once you know what to look for, breadcrumbing becomes much easier to spot: 1. Effort never increases. Weeks or months pass, but the dynamic stays the same—casual messages, no progression. 2. Plans are vague or nonexistent. “Let’s hang out sometime” replaces actual dates. 3. Communication is inconsistent: L ong gaps followed by sudden bursts of attention. 4. You’re always responding, not being pursued. You’re fitting into their life when it’s convenient and not being prioritized. 5. You feel unsettled instead of grounded. Your intuition keeps asking, What is this, really? Listen to that. What to Do Instead You don’t need to prove your worth or demand effort. You can: Ask for clarity early State your needs without apology Or step away when consistency isn’t there Someone genuinely interested will meet you with intention—not confusion. Breadcrumbing isn’t a reflection of your value, and it’s a reflection of someone else’s capacity. They can't handle the fun, then run!

The holidays are supposed to be joyful. The lights glow brighter, music fills the air, and social feeds overflow with smiling families and perfectly wrapped moments. But for many people — especially after divorce, loss, or a significant life change the holidays don’t feel magical at all. They feel heavy. Holiday depression is real, and it’s more common than we like to admit. Why the Holidays Can Trigger Depression The holiday season amplifies emotions. If you’re already navigating grief, loneliness, financial stress, or the aftermath of a relationship ending, this time of year can magnify those feelings. Common triggers include: Loss and grief — missing a partner, loved one, or the life you once had Loneliness — especially when routines change, or kids are with the other parent Comparison — measuring your reality against curated holiday perfection Pressure — to feel happy, grateful, or “over it.” Disrupted routines — less sleep, more alcohol, irregular schedules For divorcees, the holidays can be especially complicated. Traditions shift. Homes feel quieter. And the silence can be louder than any holiday party. Signs You Might Be Experiencing Holiday Depression Holiday depression doesn’t always look like sadness. It can show up as: Feeling numb or disconnected Irritability or emotional exhaustion Changes in sleep or appetite Withdrawing from friends or events A sense of dread as the holidays approach Feeling overwhelmed by things that once felt manageable If you’re thinking, “Everyone else seems fine — why am I struggling?” — you’re not alone. Let’s be clear: feeling low during the holidays does not mean you’re ungrateful, weak, or failing. It means you’re human. The holidays shine a spotlight on what’s missing as much as what’s present. Acknowledging that truth is not negativity: it’s honesty. If the weight feels too heavy, reaching out for help can make a real difference. Support might look like: Talking to a therapist or counselor , even short-term Checking in with your primary care provider , especially if symptoms feel physical Leaning on trusted friends or family — you don’t have to explain everything. Joining a support group , especially for divorce or grief Calling or texting a mental health hotline if you feel overwhelmed or unsafe If you’re in the U.S., you can call or text 988 , the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, anytime. You don’t need to be in crisis to reach out — they’re there to listen. Small Ways to Care for Yourself This Season You don’t need a complete life overhaul to survive the holidays — sometimes small steps matter most: Create new traditions , even simple ones. Permit yourself to skip events that drain you. Limit social media if it fuels comparison. Prioritize rest, nourishment, and movement. Let yourself feel what you feel — without judgment. Healing doesn’t mean forcing cheer. Sometimes it means choosing gentleness. The holidays can be a reminder of endings, but they can also quietly mark beginnings. This chapter may feel lonely or uncertain, but it does not define your future or your worth. If you’re struggling, please know this: help is available, your feelings matter, and you do not have to carry this season alone. Sometimes the bravest thing you can do during the holidays isn’t smiling through the pain — it’s asking for support. And that, too, is a form of strength.

As 2025 comes to a close, many of us find ourselves doing what we swore we wouldn’t—looking back. Not to dwell, but to understand. Divorce has a way of dividing life into before  and after , and dating post-divorce often feels like a series of emotional audits: What worked? What didn’t? And why did communication feel so hard when we were “trying again”? This year was full of both growth and grief, hope and hesitation. If you’re divorced, dating, or somewhere in between, 2025 likely brought moments that stretched you in ways you didn’t expect. The Highs: Rediscovering Yourself and Your Voice One of the biggest wins of 2025 was self-awareness. Many divorcees entered the year unsure of what they wanted, only to end it with more precise boundaries and a stronger sense of self. The highs didn’t always come from relationships; they came from you : Speaking up instead of shrinking Walking away from situations that felt confusing or one-sided Realizing peace is more attractive than chaos Choosing emotional safety over potential For some, love showed up unexpectedly in the form of a slow burn, a healthy connection, or simply learning that being alone no longer felt like failure. That’s growth. The Lows: When Trying Again Felt Harder Than Starting Over: Let’s be honest—2025 also came with its fair share of disappointment. There were the false starts. The “almosts.” The people who said they wanted connection but disappeared when it required effort. The dates that went well… until communication didn’t. One of the hardest lows for many divorcees this year was realizing that trying again  doesn’t always mean trying better, especially when old patterns resurface. Miscommunication, avoidance, and emotional shutdowns felt especially painful because we thought we were past that stage of life. Ghosting hurts more when you’ve done the work. Silence cuts deeper when you’ve learned how to communicate. The Communication Breakdown: Talking, Texting, and Then… Nothing If 2025 had a theme, it might be this: constant miscommunication or complete cut-off communication. We talked about  communication endlessly, yet struggled to practice it consistently. Some patterns that surfaced: Over-texting instead of honest conversations Avoiding hard talks to “keep things easy.” Pulling away instead of asking questions Assuming instead of clarifying Shutting down at the first sign of discomfort For divorcees, cut-off communication can be especially triggering. It echoes old wounds being dismissed, ignored, or left without answers. The silence isn’t just silence; it’s unresolved history knocking again. It's cowardly. What 2025 Taught Us About Love After Divorce This year reminded us that healing doesn’t make dating effortless; it makes it honest . Trying again doesn’t mean tolerating confusion. It doesn’t mean chasing clarity from people who can’t give it. And it definitely doesn’t mean abandoning your needs to keep someone comfortable. 2025 taught us: Consistency matters more than chemistry Communication is action, not intention Emotional availability is not negotiable Silence is an answer, and yes, it will create a new type of hurt even when you were trying to keep things simple You don’t need closure from someone who couldn’t show up - hell no, run the other way! As we step into a new year, the goal isn’t perfection—it’s awareness. Take a moment to recap your own highs and lows: Where did you grow up? Where did you settle? Where did communication break down—and what did you learn from it? You may ask WHY people are acting so immaturely still and feeling like they really couldn't care less about your feelings. You may see what you actually want and need. You may discover you are stronger than you've ever been. If 2025 taught us anything, it’s that love after divorce isn’t about starting over mindlessly. It’s about starting wiser . Learn from every experience. Just maybe trying again doesn’t mean opening your heart to everyone. It means opening it to what feels safe, reciprocal, and honest. Though be aware of the fools and the breadcrumbs. Cheers to discovery in 2026! Erin

(And Why We All Need a Yellow Light Too) Remember playing Red Light, Green Light as a kid? Run when it’s green. Stop when it’s red. Freeze when you’re caught in between. Dating later in life isn’t much different — except now, there’s a yellow light… and it matters more than ever. When you’ve lived, loved, married, divorced, healed (or are healing), you don’t get the luxury of reckless sprinting anymore. You also don’t need to slam on the brakes at the first unfamiliar moment. You need awareness. So let’s talk about red lights, green lights, and the underrated yellow light of modern dating: Red Light: Full Stop These are the non-negotiables. No bargaining. No “maybe it’ll change.” No explaining it away because you’re lonely. Red lights look like: Disrespect masked as “joking.” Inconsistent communication paired with excuses Blaming every ex for everything Rushing intimacy while avoiding emotional depth Refusing accountability or dodging hard conversations Love-bombing followed by withdrawal If it’s a red light, you stop. Don't slow down. Not “see where it goes.” You stop — because you’ve already been down roads like this, and you know where they lead. Green Light: Proceed (Thoughtfully) Green lights don’t mean perfection. They mean safety, consistency, and alignment. Green lights sound like: Words match actions Clear communication (even when it’s uncomfortable) Respect for your time, boundaries, and pace Emotional availability Curiosity about you, not just access to you Accountability without defensiveness A green light doesn’t mean sprint; it means you can move forward without abandoning yourself. Yellow Light: Slow Down & Observe Yellow lights aren’t deal-breakers — they’re data points. Yellow lights include: Recently divorced and still processing Emotionally guarded but self-aware Different communication styles Busy life seasons Hesitation around labels or timelines Yellow light doesn’t mean stop.It means pausing, watching, asking questions, and checking in with yourself. Have we made the same mistake before? We treated yellow lights like green ones — or red ones like “fixable.” Wisdom is knowing the difference. Why This Matters Modern dating isn’t about chasing chemistry at all costs. It’s about protecting your peace while staying open to connection. By now, you’ve learned: Love shouldn’t hurt constantly Attraction alone isn’t enough You don’t need to convince someone to choose you The game changes when self-trust becomes the goal — not just a relationship. Play the Game Smarter In the kids’ game, the winner isn’t the fastest runner — it’s the one who knows when to move and when to stop. Modern dating works the same way. Watch the lights.Trust your instincts Don’t rush the finish line. Because the real win isn’t finding someone to have fun with, to bring you peace, but the wondering "if" or "when" it’s finding someone without losing yourself.